中考英语写作精彩点评与修改 中考英语写作技巧

2023-07-29 14:37:04 666阅读 投稿:网友
前言刘晓伟老师—中考英语写作精彩点评与修改(三)中考英语作文题三:有些人认为中学生看电视是在浪费时间,另一些人则认为看电视对中学生




刘晓伟老师—中考英语写作精彩点评与修改(三)

中考英语作文题三:

有些人认为中学生看电视是在浪费时间,另一些人则认为看电视对中学生是有益的。请你以is watching tv a waste of time为题写一篇作文。要点如下:

1.一些人认为看电视有益,一些人则不这么认为。

2.你的看法和理由

学生习作及修改:

is watching tv a waste of time

some people think “watching tv is good for children”, but others think watching tv is a waste of time.

from my point of view, television is playing a very important role in our life, so i don’t think watching tv is a waste of time. it can also learn much from it. (we can learn much from it.) *ry *ning, my grandfather get international news on tv, he wants to know the newest massages of world. (两个句子不能用逗号“,”连接,可以合并: *ry *ning my grandfather watches international news on tv, who wants to know what is happening around the world.)my mother loves animals, she usually watches animal world. it’s too interesting. (句子合并:my mother loves animals, who usually watches animal world. it’s very interesting.) i also can learn english or other languages from some programs.

watching tv, i think it is good for us. (i think 作为*语放在句子的主谓之间。watching tv, i think, is good to us.) it can * us learn * and * knowledges we n*r know. (“增加知识”表达成:enrich one’s knowledge (不可数名词), 可以改成:it can * us enrich our knowledge we have n*r learned.)

点评:

写的比第一篇好,开头和结尾经过上课的指导都已经写到位了。问题主要出在第二段,在内容的表达上还有待提高。急需改进的还是句子的问题:简单句合并成状语从句或定语从句的问题。

中考英语作文陆续修改中:)

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